Text 390, 96 rader
Skriven 2006-09-06 22:56:09 av Ardith Hinton (1:153/716.0)
    Kommentar till text 388 av James Bradley (1:134/77.0)
Ärende: The World Turns...  3B.
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Hi again, James!  This is a continuation of my previous message to you:

AH>  And I'm not discounting your feelings...

JB>  I understood you wouldn't. I guess I just feel a
JB>  little tender when I start a 'bitch' session.


          Uh-huh.  One is more vulnerable at such times.  We tried to go to the
PNE last week, for example, and found eight wheelchair spaces guarded by people
who were being paid to keep wheelchair users out of them.  They're reserved for
exhibitors, or for trucks making deliveries... that's what we were told.  There
are no signs saying so.  But this is the area where the buses from Sunny Hill &
various other institutions used to park.  I don't know what they did this year,
since all the other remaining spaces were unavailable too.  We decided to go to
Granville Island instead... and saw at least half a dozen wheelchairs there.  I
wonder how many of the occupants had similar experiences at the PNE.

          Am I angry??  Yes.  But apart from the folks in this echo, most would
probably respond by saying "You could park on the street"... [sure, and risk an
$80 fine].  Or by asking "Why don't you take a bus, use HandyDart, etc."... [do
they really want to know?  Probably not].  If that's their notion of a "polite"
equivalent to "you should" it's a waste of time trying to convince them we have
devoted some thought to the matter.  Then there's the "see-no-evil" approach...
they can't imagine such a thing, so we must have misunderstood.  If we complain
we may feel we have to defend our actions.  However, I notice that the very few
who are willing to listen also admit they can't offer any better ideas....  :-/



JB>  I did pass on the safety harness I saw at a pawnshop. <G>


          Good!  I'd be very leery about buying such items second-hand....  :-)



AH>  The moral of the tale is that there is no way to be sure
AH>  what you'll be doing a few years down the road.

JB>  Ya... I'd probably still pass at the next safety harness
JB>  I see at a pawnshop. <L>


          Instruments are different... they need to be used.  I still miss that
sax.  A lot of tools don't go bad if they sit idle for awhile, and I'd probably
hang onto those.  Like you, however, I wouldn't acquire any more just yet.  :-)



JB>  Complaining about your shelves, while their own back yard i
JB>  is full? No, I have no idea what you are talking about. O-8*


          Many people don't connect the dots.  If this sort of thing weren't so
common, it might be regarded as a learning disability....  :-/



JB>  I raised that very issue, as my sisters tried to fix mom.


          Uh-huh.  Others have tried to fix me as well... and I suspect what it
boils down to in a lot of cases is that they want me to be more like them.  :-)



JB>  I was even criticised for being too affront with her,
JB>  yet they continue to bicker about her behaviour as soon
JB>  as she leaves a room. What are you gonna do, eh? I guess
JB>  their biggest fault is to be gossips. All I can do, is
JB>  not to contribute to that fire, while trying to explain
JB>  my position, or offer my take on actions.


          Yes, that's what I would do in most cases.  I don't know your sisters
& I'm out of my depth with regard to a lot of what goes on between siblings.  I
can't help thinking the situation bears some resemblance, however, to a problem
I had awhile ago with a certain person.  Eventually she decided to ignore me...
or so I gather, because she's done the same to other folks... hoping I'd "learn
a lesson".  And I did, but not quite the way she'd had in mind!  I found a book
called CONTROLLING PEOPLE by Patricia Evans.  I could hardly believe the two of
them weren't known to each other because the author had portrayed her with such
uncanny accuracy.  Anyway, the bottom line is that *when it's about control* it
doesn't have to make sense.  Folks like you & me will try to shed some light on
the subject... but with control freaks, one may find it counterproductive.  The
author doesn't have any real solution except to run like hell.  That may not be
practical in all cases.  Nevertheless, it's easier not to get caught up in such
games when one understands what's going on.  And while I do have some regrets I
must say the absence of carping & criticism has come as a great relief....  :-)




--- timEd/386 1.10.y2k+
 * Origin: Wits' End, Vancouver CANADA (1:153/716)