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Text 4636, 129 rader
Skriven 2006-09-01 18:43:00 av Nathan Prugh
Ärende: Humor Digest - 144
==========================
---------------------------- <Original Message> ----------------------------

   Date:  6-09-1999
   From: ROBERT RICHARDS (1:138/258)
     To: ALL
Subject: Humor Digest - 144

Humor-Digest  Monday, June 7 1999  Volume 02 : Number 144
----------------------------------------------------------------- Todays
subjects in the Best of Humor Digest are:
BOH: The ballad of Y2K
BOH: A quickie? (CLASSIC)
BOH: A defendant's testimony
----------------------------------------------------------------- BOH: The
ballad of Y2K


The ballad of Y2K
(sing to the tune of "Gilligan's Island")

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale
Of the doom that is our fate.
That started when programmers used
Two digits for a date
Two digits for a date

RAM memory was smaller then;
Hard drives were tiny, too.
"Four digits are extravagant,
So let's get by with two.
So let's get by with two."

"This works through 1999,"
The programmers did say.
"Unless we write new code by then
The data goes away.
The data goes away."

But management had not a clue;
"It works fine now, you bet!
Rewriting code cost money,
We won't do it just yet.
We won't do it just yet."

Now when 2000 rolls around
It all goes straight to hell,
For zero less then ninety-nine,
As anyone can tell.
As anyone can tell.

The mail won't bring your pension check;
It won't be sent to you
When you're no longer sixty-eight
But minus thirty-two.
But minus thirty-two.

The problems we're about to face
Are frightening, for sure.
And reading every line of code's
The only certain cure.
The only certain cure

[[ key change, the big finish coming]]
There's not much time, there's too much code,
And COBOL-coders, few.
When the century is finished,
We may be finished, too.
We may be finished, too.

------------------------------------------------------------------- BOH: A
quickie? (CLASSIC)



** A classic joke updated for today's world **
A quickie


Bill Clinton and Al Gore went into a local diner for lunch.
As they read the menu, the waitress came over and asked Clinton,
"Are you ready to order, sir?"

Clinton replies, "Yes, I'd like a quickie."

"A quickie?!" the waitress replies with disgust.
"Sir, given the current situation of your personal life, I don't believe
that’s a good idea.  I'll come back later when you are ready to make an order
from the MENU."

She walks away.

Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "Sir, it's pronounced 'Quiche'…"

---------------------------------------------------------------------- BOH: A
defendant's testimony

A defendant's testimony

"So let me get this straight," the prosecutor says to the
defendant, "you came home from work early and found your
wife in bed with a strange man."

"That's correct," says the defendant.

"Upon which," continues the prosecutor, "you take out a pistol
and shoot your wife, killing her."

"That's correct," says the defendant.

"Then my question to you is, why did you shoot your wife and
not her lover?" asked the prosecutor.

"It seemed easier," replied the defendant, "than shooting a
different man every day!"

------------------------------
End of - Humor-Digest V2 #144
******************************
brought to you by:
----------------------------------------------------------------- Best of
Humor-Digest
'This IS a laughing matter'
(http://www.bestofhumor.com)
----------------------------------------------------------------- Send Jokes:
(jokes@bestofhumor.com)


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