Text 5795, 98 rader
Skriven 2013-01-20 15:52:26 av Nick Kill (1:261/38)
Ärende: Fidonews Vol 30 no 03 Page: 4
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                          What Fun Fidonet Is!
                          By Daniel Torrey, 1:132/505

    After an absence of 20 years, I've rejoined Fidonet, and I'm
    pleased to see that not much has changed.  While there are a few
    boring echos where people are civil and thoughtful of others and
    the conversation is interesting, an awful lot of Fidonet is still
    childish, banal, hateful and thoroughly offensive.  It makes me
    proud.

    Here are Ten Handy Tips (tm) for posting in Fidonet echos, in
    particular any echo that has a high percentage of "sysops"
    (pathetic middle-aged folks who spend their lives front of their
    computers, nursing years of imagined slights and posting messages
    that could easily have come from the mind of a twelve-year-old
    boy):

    1) Belittle your opponent at every opportunity. Remember, we're
    not here to cooperate and try to communicate or to move the mail
    around, we're here to offend each other as much as possible.
    Call them liars, insult their culture, belittle their genitalia,
    accuse them of drinking bad beer.  It's especially important, if
    you have a valid point to make or an interesting observation to
    share, that you wrap it a lot of insulting language.  Otherwise,
    people might get the idea that you're trying to be friendly or
    helpful.

    2) Be sure to throw in a couple of racist jokes. Stupid ones.
    Remember, this is an international system, and it's important to
    represent your country in a positive light.  The only way to do
    that is to represent other countries/cultures in a *negative*
    light.  The more hate and bile you can spread, the more your
    opponents will fear and respect you.  This is why the world today
    is such a peaceful place.

    3) It's vitally important that you shove your politics down your
    opponent's throat at every opportunity.  After all, if people
    didn't want to hear your opinions, they wouldn't be using your
    Fidonet, would they?  If you can also parade your religion and
    sexuality in front of others, without regard to their feelings on
    the matter, so much the better.

    4) If you're an American, bring a gun. Hell, bring several. What
    these people need is to be taught a lesson they'll never forget,
    and a head-shot is the best way to do that.  Also, never admit
    that any facet of our culture is in need of improvement.
    Americans don't make mistakes.  Yer either with us or agin' us.

    5) If you're not an American, be sure to make a lot of references
    to gun culture.  In particular, do your best to rub their noses
    in the latest gun-related tragedy.  It's important to kick people
    when they're down, especially if they're bummed out about a few
    of their whinnet-ridden kids being scrobbed.  Besides, the best
    contribution you can make to help the Americans solve their
    problems is to mock them at every opportunity, because history
    has shown that this is by far the best way to effect social
    change.

    6) When reading a message, always assume the worst intentions. If
    there's any way to interpret someone's message as insulting to
    you, your forebears, your culture, your nation, or your pets,
    respond in kind.  We all know that text on a screen carries the
    full intent of any message; only losers give the opponent the
    benefit of the doubt.

    7) Reasoned discourse is for idiots. The last thing you want is
    to learn anything from anyone else.  Keep that mind tightly
    closed!

    8) Never re-read your message before posting; it's best to just
    let 'er rip.  You'll never have cause to regret anything you say,
    because you can hide safely behind your computer.  In your
    basement.  Better yet, in your Mom's basement.

    9) If you don't like what you see in an echo, or a newsletter,
    hijack it!  The only way to prevent others from spoiling your fun
    by disagreeing with you is to shut them up or shout them down.

    10) Remember, Fidonet exists for you and you alone! The other 34
    people who still donate their time and money to keep this thing
    going aren't important.  They're just doing the right thing:
    putting their efforts into keeping you entertained.  And as for
    the 34,328 people who used to be in Fidonet, and who gave up in
    disgust around 1999 and went elsewhere, well screw them, they
    were all lusers and n00bs anyway.

    If you follow these Ten Handy Tips(tm), you'll be able to rest
    assured that nobody will ever accuse you of making a positive
    contribution to Fidonet.  And by the way - screw you.


    FIDONEWS  Vol 30 No 03       Page  4         January 21, 2013


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