Tillbaka till svenska Fidonet
English   Information   Debug  
FIDO_SYSOP   12841
FIDO_UTIL   0/180
FILEFIND   0/209
FILEGATE   0/212
FILM   0/18
FNEWS_PUBLISH   4155
FN_SYSOP   41520
FN_SYSOP_OLD1   71952
FTP_FIDO   0/2
FTSC_PUBLIC   0/13563
FUNNY   0/4886
GENEALOGY.EUR   0/71
GET_INFO   105
GOLDED   0/408
HAM   0/16041
HOLYSMOKE   0/6791
HOT_SITES   0/1
HTMLEDIT   0/71
HUB203   466
HUB_100   264
HUB_400   39
HUMOR   0/29
IC   0/2851
INTERNET   0/424
INTERUSER   0/3
IP_CONNECT   719
JAMNNTPD   0/233
JAMTLAND   0/47
KATTY_KORNER   0/41
LAN   0/16
LINUX-USER   0/19
LINUXHELP   0/1155
LINUX   0/22002
LINUX_BBS   0/957
mail   18.68
mail_fore_ok   249
MENSA   0/341
MODERATOR   0/102
MONTE   0/992
MOSCOW_OKLAHOMA   0/1245
MUFFIN   0/783
MUSIC   0/321
N203_STAT   894
N203_SYSCHAT   313
NET203   321
NET204   69
NET_DEV   0/10
NORD.ADMIN   0/101
NORD.CHAT   0/2572
NORD.FIDONET   189
NORD.HARDWARE   0/28
NORD.KULTUR   0/114
NORD.PROG   0/32
NORD.SOFTWARE   0/88
NORD.TEKNIK   0/58
NORD   0/453
OCCULT_CHAT   0/93
OS2BBS   0/787
OS2DOSBBS   0/580
OS2HW   0/42
OS2INET   0/37
OS2LAN   0/134
OS2PROG   0/36
OS2REXX   0/113
OS2USER-L   207
OS2   0/4779
OSDEBATE   0/18996
PASCAL   0/490
PERL   0/457
PHP   0/45
POINTS   0/405
POLITICS   0/29554
POL_INC   0/14731
PSION   103
R20_ADMIN   1117
R20_AMATORRADIO   0/2
R20_BEST_OF_FIDONET   13
R20_CHAT   0/893
R20_DEPP   0/3
R20_DEV   399
R20_ECHO2   1379
R20_ECHOPRES   0/35
R20_ESTAT   0/719
R20_FIDONETPROG...
...RAM.MYPOINT
  0/2
R20_FIDONETPROGRAM   0/22
R20_FIDONET   0/248
R20_FILEFIND   0/24
R20_FILEFOUND   0/22
R20_HIFI   0/3
R20_INFO2   2632
R20_INTERNET   0/12940
R20_INTRESSE   0/60
R20_INTR_KOM   0/99
R20_KANDIDAT.CHAT   42
R20_KANDIDAT   28
R20_KOM_DEV   112
R20_KONTROLL   0/13030
R20_KORSET   0/18
R20_LOKALTRAFIK   0/24
R20_MODERATOR   0/1852
R20_NC   76
R20_NET200   245
R20_NETWORK.OTH...
...ERNETS
  0/13
R20_OPERATIVSYS...
...TEM.LINUX
  0/44
R20_PROGRAMVAROR   0/1
R20_REC2NEC   534
R20_SFOSM   0/340
R20_SF   0/108
R20_SPRAK.ENGLISH   0/1
R20_SQUISH   107
R20_TEST   2
R20_WORST_OF_FIDONET   12
RAR   0/9
RA_MULTI   106
RA_UTIL   0/162
REGCON.EUR   0/2055
REGCON   0/13
SCIENCE   0/1206
SF   0/239
SHAREWARE_SUPPORT   0/5146
SHAREWRE   0/14
SIMPSONS   0/169
STATS_OLD1   0/2539.065
STATS_OLD2   0/2530
STATS_OLD3   0/2395.095
STATS_OLD4   0/1692.25
SURVIVOR   0/495
SYSOPS_CORNER   0/3
SYSOP   0/84
TAGLINES   0/112
TEAMOS2   0/4530
TECH   0/2617
TEST.444   0/105
TRAPDOOR   0/19
TREK   0/755
TUB   0/290
UFO   0/40
UNIX   0/1316
USA_EURLINK   0/102
USR_MODEMS   0/1
VATICAN   0/2740
VIETNAM_VETS   0/14
VIRUS   0/378
VIRUS_INFO   0/201
VISUAL_BASIC   0/473
WHITEHOUSE   0/5187
WIN2000   0/101
WIN32   0/30
WIN95   0/4275
WIN95_OLD1   0/70272
WINDOWS   0/1517
WWB_SYSOP   0/419
WWB_TECH   0/810
ZCC-PUBLIC   0/1
ZEC   4

 
4DOS   0/134
ABORTION   0/7
ALASKA_CHAT   0/506
ALLFIX_FILE   0/1313
ALLFIX_FILE_OLD1   0/7997
ALT_DOS   0/152
AMATEUR_RADIO   0/1039
AMIGASALE   0/14
AMIGA   0/331
AMIGA_INT   0/1
AMIGA_PROG   0/20
AMIGA_SYSOP   0/26
ANIME   0/15
ARGUS   0/924
ASCII_ART   0/340
ASIAN_LINK   0/651
ASTRONOMY   0/417
AUDIO   0/92
AUTOMOBILE_RACING   0/105
BABYLON5   0/17862
BAG   135
BATPOWER   0/361
BBBS.ENGLISH   0/382
BBSLAW   0/109
BBS_ADS   0/5290
BBS_INTERNET   0/507
BIBLE   0/3563
BINKD   0/1119
BINKLEY   0/215
BLUEWAVE   0/2173
CABLE_MODEMS   0/25
CBM   0/46
CDRECORD   0/66
CDROM   0/20
CLASSIC_COMPUTER   0/378
COMICS   0/15
CONSPRCY   0/899
COOKING   27611
COOKING_OLD1   0/24719
COOKING_OLD2   0/40862
COOKING_OLD3   0/37489
COOKING_OLD4   0/35496
COOKING_OLD5   9370
C_ECHO   0/189
C_PLUSPLUS   0/31
DIRTY_DOZEN   0/201
DOORGAMES   0/1974
DOS_INTERNET   0/196
duplikat   5999
ECHOLIST   0/18295
EC_SUPPORT   0/318
ELECTRONICS   0/359
ELEKTRONIK.GER   1534
ENET.LINGUISTIC   0/13
ENET.POLITICS   0/4
ENET.SOFT   0/11701
ENET.SYSOP   33774
ENET.TALKS   0/32
ENGLISH_TUTOR   0/2000
EVOLUTION   0/1335
FDECHO   0/217
FDN_ANNOUNCE   0/7068
FIDONEWS   23439
FIDONEWS_OLD1   0/49742
FIDONEWS_OLD2   0/35949
FIDONEWS_OLD3   0/30874
FIDONEWS_OLD4   0/37224
Möte FUNNY, 4886 texter
 lista första sista föregående nästa
Text 1991, 105 rader
Skriven 2005-05-09 08:23:38 av Greg Sears (1:153/307)
     Kommentar till en text av George Pope
Ärende: Books
=============
.  o  _   From the Desk of Greg Sears AREA: F-UNNY
. Q\_|_)   --=[ I C E-man's Oldy Goldies for CyberPope ]=--
. T> III                     Another try!

  Old Granny was eighty-seven and her health was very poor, but
she definitely would not consent to see a doctor.  Finally, her
granddaughter requested her family physician to come to the house and
examine her grandmother thoroughly.

  After the doctor left, Granny yelled for her granddaughter.

  "Sara," she said, "who in the world was that nice young
preacher?"

  "Well, I have to confess, Granny," said Sara, that was no
preacher....he was a doctor."

  "A doctor!" exclaimed the grandmother with great disappointment.
"Well, I thought he looked a little too familiar to be a preacher!"

Then ---------------------------------------

  A tourist stopped his car on a country road and asked a young
boy, "How far is it to Smithville."

  "Well," said the boy, "the way you are going, it's about 24,996
miles, but if you turn around, it's about four."

Then ---------------------------------------

  In the local school's Nature Program, the teacher was
introducing a unit on "The Five Senses."  The dialogue with the teacher
and the three-to-four-year-olds went thus:

  Teacher:  We have eyes for.....?

  Children:  Seeing!

  Teacher:  And a nose for.....?

  Children:  Smelling!

  Teacher:  And ears for.....?

  One Child:  Earrings!

Then ---------------------------------------

   Have you ever been driving down the road when suddenly a toll both
pops up from out of nowhere so you say to yourself, "damn, where did
this toll booth come from?"  So you fish under the seat for some change
and feel something odd and say, "hey, what's this?" and pull a fish from
out underneath the seat?  It's not an ordinary fish, of course.  I mean,
why would just an ordinary fish be under your seat?  How would it get
there?

   But anyway, there's this fish and you can't put it in the little cup
with the net around it at the booth since there's no way it'll fit.
Besides, it  would make the change box all slimy and gooey.  So you say
to yourself, "hey, self, what am I gonna do with this fish?"  I mean,
you can't just throw it out the window since there's a two hundred
dollar fine for littering.  And you don't want to put it in your glove
compartment because it's not a glove.  And you can't put it back under
the seat because it'll get in the way when you have to look for more
change.  You know?  So you're just driving down the road with this fish
resting on your lap... you have to put in in your lap since one hand is
going for some change under the seat, and the other has to be on the
wheel... but anyway, you're driving and find some change just as you
come to the little white and red striped gate and throw the change into
the net and it slides into the hole and the little green light with the
smily face comes on and the gate rises so you go through.  But you've
still got this fish on your lap that you don't know what to do with.
And you want to get rid of it, I mean, what if a police stops you?  How
are you going to explain a fish in your lap?  So you know you have to
get rid of it.  I mean, how would that look to your family and all your
friends when your name is printed in bold in the police blotter of your
local newspaper because you've been arrested for statutory rape of a
carp?  I mean, you know you didn't touch it, but you think the judge is
going to look at it that way?  No sir ree bob.  Sure, he's had his share
of fish in his car too, but he'd never admit his dark secret to anyone
and he has to make an example out of you.  I mean, could you blame him
if you were in his position?  He's a respectable member of the
community.

   But anyway, you've got this fish on your lap that you have to get rid
of before you get stopped.  So you try and think of some way to ditch
the fish.  Maybe leave it on a doorstep with a note that reads, "Dear
Sir or Ma'am, I'm a poor and humble soul and I regret that I can not
take care of my fish any longer. So I humbly beg of you to take this
fish and raise it as your own, so it may know the kindness of a good
family and a warm heart."  But then you realize that no one would take a
fish from under your seat as their own. I mean, why would they?  After
all, It's only a fish.


         ,-.___,-.
 Cheers  \_/_ _\_/
  from     )O_O(
   the    { (_) }
 I C E-man `-^-' DILLIGAFF

... George Pope. . . . Said that 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2?

--- EzyBlueWave V2.01b005 00F90260
 * Origin: Milky Way, Langley, BC [604] 532-4367 (1:153/307)