Text 2632, 115 rader
Skriven 2005-09-25 01:31:08 av Greg Sears (3:633/104)
     Kommentar till en text av George Pope
Ärende: Re: F unny
==================
  -=> G-day George Pope,
        the BBs was broken for a while, BUT Greg Sears is back! <=-

 GP> On (05 Sep 05) Greg Sears wrote to JONATHAN ORDISH...
 GS> They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming.
   > Like the night before the last earthquake hit, our family dog took the
   > car keys and drove to Arizona.

       -=> George Pope wrote a message to Greg Sears <=-


 GP> I think he was driving to meet Fifi that slutty french poodle who
   > escaped New Orleans the day before Hurricane Katrina hit!

OR

  Two doctors were discussing a case in the psych ward. The first doc
asked what had triggered such a profound depressive psychosis in the
patient. The second one answered, "He's a lawyer. One day at home, he
started to think about how much money he'd screwed his partners and
clients out of over the last few years. He laughed so hard he defecated
in his pants. When he smelled the foul odor he had created, he checked
for the source. Finding his trousers full of the stuff, he thought he
was leaking. This caused him to go into shock and faint.

  When he woke up, he found he had fallen on his arm, breaking it." The
first doc asked, "He went mad because he broke an arm?" The second
medico answered, "No, he went mad because he couldn't figure out how to
sue himself!"


> OBJoke: for our Moderator and all-round friend/servant

  A farmer had just bought the best used car he could afford, and he was
driving it home. One of the town's lawyers was hitching a ride by the
side of the road where his BMW had broken down. The farmer picked him
up. Being his usual degrading self, the lawyer asked the farmer,

  "How do you like this new manure spreader you got here?" The farmer
replied, "Don't know yet. You're the first load I've hauled."


> OBOneliners: for Mr <+]::-{(} ("Cyberpope")

  Many babies are descended from a long line...which began on a date.

  A baby is a person who must have bottle or bust.

  A baby stroller is last year's fun on wheels.

  A straight line is the shortest distance between a baby and
anything breakable.

  Two's company...three's the result.

  Indigestion is what you get when a square meal doesn't fit in a
round stomach.

  It's useless crying over spilled milk, unless it's condensed.

  Why would Swiss chess have the holes when it's Limburger that
needs the ventilation?

  A cheese cake is something that turns to pound cake when you eat it.

  Forget the gas guzzler: The most expensive vehicle to operate,
by the mile is the shopping cart.

  Ever notice how many people eat with their fingers and talk with
their fork?

  April 15th is the only day when blanks can kill.

  According to the government, a taxpayer is someone who has what it
takes.

  The IRS is a place that says, "Watch your step" going in, and
"Watch your language" going out.

  The ideal situation, of course, is for the government to live
within its means and without yours.

  The IRS is a pain in the neck, and some people have an even
lower opinion of them.

  People who save their money for a rainy day end up getting
soaked by the government.

  Taxation is a bizarre system in which you spend money, save
receipts, and somehow come out ahead.

  An ulcer is:
    -a pain in the neck that dropped.
    -something you get not from what you eat but from what's
      eating you.
    -something that comes from big money...either earning it

      or owing it.
  The cheapest way to have your family tree traced is to run for a
public office.

Question: Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Answer: The chicken, of course. God couldn't lay an egg.


>      .-.
>    .(  °> Cheers,
>   //)'')  from the
>  ///''/   I C E-man
> //-"-"-------------

... George Pope. . . . Said that 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2?

--- EzyBlueWave V2.01b006 00F90257
 * Origin: Afraid of the competition? We ARE the Competition! (3:633/104)