Text 3611, 125 rader
Skriven 2006-03-03 07:05:00 av George Pope (2510.funny)
   Kommentar till text 3585 av Greg Sears (3:633/104)
Ärende: Re: Rumours from Funny. .
=================================
GS>  GP> Didn't you read the part "while drinking"?  (that was "while drinking
GS>    > the pitcher of beers George bought...")
GS>
GS> Well maybe you may have, I can't remember now...the whole story seems only
GS> a ~bad~ dream now?? '-)))

Is this how Kiwis try to welsh out of a bet and a shout?

GS>    > Yes, and why did you give me the 60 year old blonde? ;-)
GS>
GS>  GP> Because I heard you like young blondes?
GS>
GS> Of course, so that's why she was an old blonde!! ;-(((

Well, I compared her to YOUR age, of course!

GS>  GP> I still won, then, and you owe me my $20.00 back, plus anotheu $20.00
GS>    > -- plus it's your shout on a pitcher of Molson Canadian beer!
GS>
GS> Ok Mate, come on down....................

How you gonna shout me a pitcher of Molson Canadian beer if I go down there?

GS>  GP> So one guy asked the other, "What'd you spend your weekend doing?"
GS>    > "Dropping hooks into water," was the answer.
GS>    > "So were you fishing or golfing?"
GS>
GS> More than likely fishing, cause in golf if the ball lands in the water,
GS> it stays in the water!!

He didn't say he kept playing the same ball, did he?

GS>     Our teachers have gone to college for years to understand us, but
GS> they expect us to understand them without any education at all.

What did they expect when their job is to teach  "the 3 R's" but only one of
them actually starts with 'R'!

Speaking of education. . .


We've all seen the test scores.  Americans consistanly score amongst the
lowest of industrialized nations in math, science, and literacy.

However, the incompetence goes even further.  In nations whose populace
routinely terrorizes itself, America is quickly secluding its place at
the bottom of the proverbial barrel.  Not only can we not count properly
(Q: Billy, how many rounds would a student need to kill 15 people,
including himself?  A: Over 900.), but we can't even build operational
bombs.  Why?  Well, we're obviously poor in science too.  Your average
Palestinian or Irish teenager can construct 50 bombs and have at least
45 explode properly.  We Americans are raising a generation that had
trouble getting a small fraction explode properly.

This line of thought was raised by me today at lunch with a bunch of my
fellow classmates.  It wasn't until their reaction to this an another
conversation that I realized that arrogant stupidity has become the
American Identity.

Of course, my classmates were appalled that I could think this way.

"There's nothing funny about students killing other students." one
cretin said.

Me: "No.  But it is awfully pitiful that their hit rate was below 2
bullets out of 100.  And they made 50 bombs and only a few went off.
That's my definition of failure."

"Well, wait till one of your kids gets killed at school, and then come
back and tell me how funny it is."

Me: "Whatever.  If you can't see that this was a total failure, then
there is no helping you.  Give me 40 rounds and a crowded school, and I
could easily have a higher kill rate."

With this they decided to change the conversation.  I'm not sure whether
they were uncomfortable with that coming out of a classmates mouth, or
if they realized that they were ass-challenged.  The topic change proved
that the former was indeed the case.

"Did you see that thing on TV about this woman who was wearing her
seatbelt and it totally messed up her abdomen?  She wasn't wearing her
seatbelt properly and it caused all sorts of abdominal problems."

Me: "She was obviously too stupid to operate her seatbelt correctly."

At this point, 6 of the 7 others began to tell me that not everyone
knows how to operate their seatbelt correctly.  I replied, "Well,
they're stupid."

It was at this point that Bonnie decided to prove a point to me.  "Well,
I didn't know how to wear my seatbelt properly, and I'm not stupid."

Me: "Anyone who purchases a $15,000 dollar item and fails to read the
instruction manual is stupid.  Correct operation of the seatbelt is
clearly labelled in your owners manual."

"Why should I read the instructions on something I already know how to
operate?"

This point was lost on her.  Only arrogant stupidity would stop someone
from reading the owners manual to one of the most expensive items they
own, especially when the proper operation of such a device has direct
relevance to the continued well being of yourself.

And these people will be operating more and more complicated medical
machinery at a hospital near you.

I feel much safer now.  Really, I do.

Author Unknown



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