Text 4796, 106 rader
Skriven 2007-03-01 00:01:00 av George Pope (234.funny)
Ärende: Echostats
=================
RR> Toplist of writers
RR>
RR> Place Name                                               Msgs    Bytes Quot
RR>    1. Greg Sears <3:772/210>                               21    39277   2.
RR>    2. George Pope <1:124/6308>                              2     3061  27.
RR>    3. Rick Van Ruth <3:640/954>                             1     4268
RR>       Robert E Starr JR <1:14/400>                          1     1505

So where'd they all go? :(

Damb!  We used to be POPULAR!!!!

We're still as funny as ever, just not as appreciated. . . *sigh*

Come on, tell your friends!

And Robert! How come you don't even get a place ranking?

All the above was just a lead-in to posting the below OJ:

From:    Marianne E Rantz (via UGA HUMOR listserv)
Subject: Poetry...[Adultish...]

Nothing can express how you feel better than a poem.

These are entries to a competition asking for a rhyme with the
most romantic first line but least romantic second line . . . .

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
but I only slept with you, because I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's
empty and so is your head.

Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
This describes everything you are not.

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes-
Damn, I'm good at telling you lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming
That's why I always wake up screaming.

My love you take my breath away
What have you stepped in to smell this way.

My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for maybe "go to hell".

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.

The Top 10 Clever Things to Say to Convince Your Lover to Go Down on You

~*~ "If I eat a lot of sugar first, it'll be just like those Cadbury=20
Creme Eggs that you like so much."

~*~ "Honey, I was thinking: you know how you like fresh salmon and=20
steamed clams?"

~*~ "No, I swear, Honey, the TV remote is in there somewhere. Just keep=20
looking."

~*~ "So, twenty bucks then?"

~*~ "No honey, that's not moss growing out of my navel -- it's=20
mistletoe!"

~*~ "With my thighs covering your ears, you won't have to listen to=20
Oprah."

~*~ "Honey, try this and tell me if it tastes funny to you..."

~*~ "At work today Brad Johnson said *his* wife could out-blow *my*=20
wife!  Can you imagine?!?"

~*~ "Look, do you want that raise or not?"

~*~ "The Taliban has outlawed it -- it's your patriotic duty, dammit!"



Your Moderator and all-round friend/servant,
|<+]::-{)} ("Cyberpope")
Internet: gapope@vcn.bc.ca
1)If you don't like a joke, post 2-3 examples of what you DO like!
B)If you DO like a joke, say thank-you with 2-3 jokes of your own! :)

(AKA the Bishop of ROM!)

... nfx v3.1 down at the end of Lonely Street...in Heartbreak Hotel....      
--- SBBSecho 2.12-Win32
 * Origin: Collin County Station (1:124/6308)