Text 1653, 89 rader
Skriven 2004-08-30 18:32:14 av Joe Schweier (1:275/312.1)
Ärende: Hockey
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To All, 

Since September 11, 2001, Americans and Canadians have come together as 
never before in our generation. We have banded together to overcome 
tremendous adversity. We have weathered direct attacks on our own soil, 
wars overseas, corporate/government scandal, layoffs, unemployment, 
stock price plunges, droughts, fires, mad cow, SARS, high gasoline prices, 
and a myriad of economic and physical disasters both great and small. 
But now, we must come together once again to overcome our greatest 
challenge yet. 

Hundreds of Professional Hockey players in our very own nation are 
going to be locked out, living at well below the seven-figure salary 
level. And as if that weren't bad enough they could be deprived of their 
life giving pay for several months, possibly longer, as a result of the 
upcoming lockout situation. But you can help! 

For only $20,835 a month, about $694.50 a day (that's less than the cost 
of a large screen projection TV) you can help an NHL player remain 
economically viable during his time of need. This contribution by no 
means solves the problem as it barely covers the annual minimum salary, 
but it's a start, and every little bit will help! 

Although $700 may not seem like a lot of money to you, to a hockey 
player it could mean the difference between spending the lockout 
golfing in Florida or on a Mediterranean cruise. For you, seven 
hundred dollars is nothing more than a month's rent, half a mortgage 
payment, or a month of medical insurance, but to a hockey player, $700 
will partially replace his daily salary. 

Your commitment of less than $700 a day will enable a player to buy that 
home entertainment centre, trade in the year-old Lexus for a new 
Ferrari, or enjoy a weekend in Rio. 

HOW WILL I KNOW THAT I'M HELPING? 

Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the player you 
sponsor. Detailed information about his stocks, bonds, 401(k), 
real estate, and other investment holdings will be mailed to your 
home. Plus, upon signing up for this program, you will receive an unsigned 
photo of the player lounging during the lockout on a beach somewhere in 
the Caribbean (for a signed photo, please include an additional $150). Put 
the photo on your refrigerator to remind you of other peoples' suffering. 

HOW WILL HE KNOW I'M HELPING? 

Your NHL player will be told that he has a SPECIAL FRIEND who just 
wants to help in a time of need. Although the player won't know your 
name, he will be able to make collect calls to your home via a special 
operator in case additional funds are needed for unforeseen expenses. 

YES, I WANT TO HELP! 

I would like to sponsor a locked out NHL player. My preference is 
(check below): 

[ ] Forward [ ] Defenseman [ ] Goaltender [ ] Entire team (Please call 
our 900 number to ask for the cost of a specific team - $10 per minute) 
[ ] Jaromir Jagr (Higher cost: $32,000 per day) 

Please charge the account listed below $694.50 per day for the duration of 
the lockout. Please send me a picture of the player I have sponsored, 
along with a Jaromir Jagr 2001 Income Statement and my very own Bob 
Goodenow (Executive Director of the NHLPA player's Union) pin to wear 
proudly on my hat (include $80 for hat). 

Your Name: _______________________ 

Telephone Number: _______________________ 

Account Number: _______________________ Exp.Date: _______ 

[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Other 

Signature: _______________________ 

Alternate card (when the primary card exceeds its credit limit): 

Account Number: _______________________ Exp.Date:_______ 

[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Other 

Signature: _______________________

IB JOE
AKA Joe Schweier
Sysop of joesbbs.com
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