Text 468, 106 rader
Skriven 2010-08-22 12:06:28 av hap newsom (1:124/311)
     Kommentar till en text av MICHAEL LOO
Ärende: RE: woes 483
====================
Ahoy Michael!!

->  HN> Remind him that to have a friend you must
->  HN> be a friend.
-> 
-> Without the concept of friendship, this is difficult.
-> And the simple idea that one can treat another person
-> well is not a lesson that his upbringing taught him.
-> 
A sad predicament you find yourself in my friend.
Your ethics won't permit you to abandon him, his
won't let you live in peace unless you do.

->  Treat others as you would like
->  HN> them to treat you...of course it won't work,
-> 
-> Neh. I sometimes get temporary results out of citing
-> norms of reciprocity or justice, but that's not
-> reliable. I think that he's fought so long to get
-> what's "his" that he can't function in any other
-> worldview.
->
In this case any results is good results!
 
->  HN> but you'll at least be able to say you've given
->  HN> it a shot! And of course you are right. At this
-> 
-> Been there, done that. For over 30 years.
-> 
->  HN> point it's moot...he's not going to change.
-> 
-> The social worker I consulted when he was still a
-> teenager (without my parents' permission) said the same
-> thing, that irreversible damage had been done by the
-> time he was walking. My sister and I, both enduring the
-> same influence of a family whose parents despised each
-> other and who should never have gotten together, got
-> some of the same characteristics that Jonathan is the
-> poster boy for. Speaking of poster boy, he still makes
-> the claim that his college psychiatrist called him
-> "the poster boy for abortion, euthanasia, and the
-> death penalty" - dispositive evidence for psychosis,
-> either his or the psychiatrist's or both; he's strangely
-> consistent in his recounting of this, down to the wording,
-> which is odd, as mostly he can't remember what he (or
-> anyone else) said five minutes before - and covers it up
-> by pretending that what was said is what he imagines
-> should have been said. Which would work okay, except his
-> idea of what should be is quite different from what the
-> rest of the world thinks.
->
So are most of our ideas....but we have the
"civility" to keep that thought to ourselves.
He has not...much to his detriment.
It seems as though you're destined to be his
caretaker, unless he does something so 
psychotic that  it gets him institutionalized. 
 
->  HN> Anne and I are here in Sebastapol, visiting
->  HN> Amanda for a few days. It's wonderully cool
->  HN> here and theres a bit of fog in from the coast.
->  HN> Hopefully we'll get to visit a winery today!!
-> 
-> Sebastopol is nice. Hoist a glass of De Loach Pinot Noir
-> or Zin in my direction!
->
No wineries so far :-( but I did have a rather
nice pinot noir from the russian river area at
dinner the other night. Today I'll be going out 
to Bodega Bay and making chili for the residents
of Amanda's graduate student housing dorm. It
will be "mild" but it won't be vegetarian like the
last time I made it there! 
A couple of nights ago we walked to the nearest
Mexican restaurant (El Coronel) and had dinner.
I had "Steak Ranchero" which is carne asada 
with tomatoes, onions, and jalepeno's sauteed 
and added on top of the steak...they were the
hottest jalepeno's I've ever had!! About on a
par with thai birdseye peppers! Nearly took the
top of my head off!! My eyes watered, nose ran,
sweat poured off me! I finally had to put the rest
of them aside just to be able to finish the dinner!!
Fortunately they were typical of jalepeno's and 
were all "mouth heat" and no after burner action
happened! (whew!!). 
It's been a short but nice visit. With Anne's 
back problems, and my wonky knee we have 
not been as active as our usual visits. We 
still have plans of visiting Geyserville on 
monday and also the petrified forest there
as well...but we'll see how we are on monday.
 
-> --mm
-> Braised duck legs with Pinot Noir sauce
-> cat: main
-> servings: 4
->
We sat and watched Duck Soup last night
at Amanda's place! ...however we were
drinking Full Sail Amber Ale...not pinot !
 
chat with you soon!
hap 
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